Youtuber Cole Labrant is probably one of the most animated, yet mature 22-year-olds we know. At the age of 20, he became an instant father when he married Savannah Soutas, who was already a mother to beautiful little Everly.
The couple wrote a book, Cole & Sav: Our Surprising Love Story, and dropped some serious truth bombs about dating, relationships and marriage.
Here’s the ones we loved the most.
1. FLEEEEEEE From Anything That Causes You to Stumble
In 1 Corinthians 6:18, the Bible says to “flee from sexual immorality,” meaning, run in the opposite direction! Cole avoided situations that could lead to disaster, like being “alone with a girl.” He didn’t drink, and skipped out on dating girls he didn’t see as a potential marriage partner. Fun fact: Savannah was his first and last girlfriend!
2. You Need An Accountability Partner
When another person’s looking from the outside in, they see things we can’t. Find someone you trust with your deepest thoughts and feelings. Tell them your boundaries and how you plan to keep them. Make sure this person’s bold enough to call you out when you’re slippin’. When you’re attracted to someone, remaining pure can be tough. We all need help, and despite popular belief, we can judge each other…righteously. Righteous judgement is helping a falling friend stand back up.
You are the company you keep. Proverbs 13:20 says this: “Those who walk with the wise get wiser, but those who hang out with fools suffer harm.”
3. Your Idea of Your Partner Could Be the Opposite of God’s
As a committed virgin, Cole assumed he too would marry a virgin. He saw friends slip, recalled times he could have, but chose to flee instead. Still, he never imagined he’d marry a non-virgin, much less a parent. Cole believes he was judgemental towards others who didn’t wait. He realized that God didn’t love a person more or less, depending on their virginity. Still, he made it clear that the Bible calls us to all forms of purity, including sexual purity, which is why he and Savannah chose abstinence until marriage.
4. Don’t Judge a Person’s Past, But Their Present
We all have a past, and have done things we regret. If we’re all judged on our past and not our present, we wouldn’t have a chance at anything. That’s why we need to see a person for who they are today, and remember that just as Christ forgave our sins when we asked, he’s forgiven theirs. In 2 Corinthians 5:17, the Bible says we are a new creation. “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has gone, the new is here!”
5. Practice what you preach
If you vocally say something, follow your proclamations with action. If you mess up, jump right back on the wagon. Don’t use it as an excuse to fall back into sin. Because like a diet, the moment you give in, you binge.
Cole made a promise to honor Christ by abstaining from sex before marriage. At one point, he and Savannah lived together with her daughter and her mom, but they still remained abstinent. While we don’t recommend this, the couple said that they had people around them, and made sure to sleep in separate rooms. If they wanted their relationship to work, God had to be at the center of it, and they had to follow his Word. According to Cole, their Youtube following, as well as Everly, were both accountability partners. Cole reminded himself of how far he came, and he didn’t’ want to ruin it.
6. Talk Things Out/ Having Conflict is OK
One time, Cole flew out to see Savanah, because of a secret she kept. They laid everything out, and then dropped the subject. The point is, they were vulnerable and honest the first time, so there was no need to bring it up again.
Reality check: every relationship has conflict. It’s how you work through it that matters. That requires prayer on both parts, patience, and a willingness to listen and an attempt to understand the other.
Have you read the book? If so, was there anything that you learned from it? Tell us in the comments below!